How to Keep Your Marriage Healthy and Strong

There are many seasons that a marriage goes through. Of course, we all enjoy the elation experienced during the courtship and honeymoon period, but like all marriages–life happens and seasons change. We talk a lot on this blog about healthy living. Another piece to that puzzle includes a healthy and strong marriage.

With divorce statistics holding at over fifty percent even in the Christian world, have you ever wondered how some couples seem to run a steady and stable course, during the ups, downs and cycles of life? How do these couples keep their marriage healthy during times when life’s demands seem to be pulling for every bit of attention and somehow a 24-hour day just doesn’t seem to offer as much time as it used to? As the Word of God reminds us in Ecclesiastes 1:9, “There’s nothing new under the sun.” What worked for mom and dad, grandma and grandpa, still works for us today. The key is to take these principles and apply them:

Number 1- Prayer

Setting aside time each day to pray with your spouse is vital. When the two of you come into agreement over your finances, your children, your health, and your marriage, it is a powerful thing. Praying with and for each other not only brings you closer to God, it also brings you closer to each other and builds a hedge of protection around your family.

Praying for each other is a way of caring for each other spiritually. Just as you may cook for your spouse to care for their physical needs, praying for each other is a way to care for each other and strengthen each other spiritually. Prayer helps to develop true intimacy with each other and with God.

Many couples pray together first thing in the morning or just before bed. I agree with both of those times, but also would encourage the two of you to pray for each other “as needed.” If your spouse needs wisdom for an important business meeting or is experiencing anxiety of any kind, stop right then and pray with your spouse. Prayer is a powerful force.

Number 2 – Read the Word Together

Private study and meditation of the Word is important, but you should also set aside time each day, or at least a couple of times each week, to read the Bible together.

Read to each other and spend time praying about what you’ve read. As the two of you discuss and meditate on what you are learning together, you’ll find that you will discover the treasures of the Word in a new and exciting way. You will realize a Truth and as you share that with your spouse, they will add their own thoughts and revelation to it. Before you know it, you will be looking forward to this intimate time together with God.

Number 3 – Make Decisions Together

Many couples have run into trouble when bitterness arises due to one of the partners feeling left out of the loop. Commit to making important decision as a team.

Financial decisions should always be made together, since this is an area that can cause extreme stress on a relationship. Let’s say one of the partners continuously overspends or is guilty of frequently purchasing frivolous items. There should be a freedom in the marriage to openly discuss and respect the other partner’s thoughts on this issue.

Once an issue is brought out into the open, a decision to change the situation should be made and then respected.  Many marriages have hit rock bottom due to accumulated debt and the refusal to see “eye-to-eye” on financial issues. Keeping financial secrets from each other can drive a wedge between the two of you faster than almost anything. Protect your marriage by always operating as a team.

If you agree to a mutual decision on how the finances are handled, this will strengthen trust between the two of you. A refusal to keep secrets from each other is one of the best ways to develop trust as a couple.

Number 4 – Commit to a Church

Finding a place of worship where the two of you will feel comfortable and grow together spiritually is vital. By committing to a church and serving together in ministry, your bond as a couple will strengthen and you will also be able to connect with other likeminded couples. As you learn together and then begin to mentor other couples and help them to grow in Christ, your family will absolutely flourish.

Number 5 – Make Time for Romance

Sometimes there is so much to be accomplished in a day that couples forget to take time to keep the romantic side of their relationship alive. Date nights, time alone, and intimate moments are very important to the strength of a relationship.

Don’t feel guilty if you take time away from your children to spend moments alone. Many couples neglect this area, even to the point of bringing children along during anniversary getaways. Do you love your children? Of course you do! Family bonding is very important, but so is time alone where you can have the freedom to rekindle the fire that first brought the two of you together.

Even little things like leaving a love note or picking a flower for your spouse can provide that feeling of “extra special treatment.” We all need that. With children and schedules, continuing a dating life may take strategic planning, but it is well worth the trouble in the long run.

Take these five keys to heart. Apply them sincerely, even if the two of you have drifted apart recently. You may not be able to implement all five right away, but do the best you can. If you are sincere in your heart about developing a healthy and strong marriage,  just do your part and God will certainly do His!